I did a survey / poll on LinkedIn recently and the results hit me like an ice bucket challenge.​

It reminded me of something so fundamental that we don't think about it too much.

95% of people misunderstand the RIGHT mindset. They focus on becoming confident, motivated and filled with self-belief.

I'm all for that. It's useful to get you through the inevitable ups and downs of our life in sales.

But that's not the RIGHT mindset, it's just a useful starting point.

So what is the right mindset? Well, let's start from the fact that state is infectious.

Either negatively like a virus.

Or positively, like the buzz at a great concert.

WHEN TWO PEOPLE TALK...

One of the lessons that I learned earliest from Richard Bandler (one of the founders of NLP) is that when two people have a conversation, one of them is going to influence the state and mindset of the other person.

Basically, the person who is most committed to their state will take the other person with them.

If you wanted to summarise 90% of Tony Robbins' work in a single sentence, that's it.

And it's not just emotion, it's focus and belief.

Or, to put it another way, when a salesperson meets a prospect one of them is going to change the emotions, focus and mindset of the other.

BUT here's where it gets interesting - and where most people get it totally wrong. Frankly, I'm sad to say, including most trainers and coaches.

PUMP UP THE VOLUME?

When most people talk about mindset and state, they think about being pumped up, in a peak state, ready to walk on fire or break pine boards with their hand.

I've done both. I've taught both. Neither is difficult.

But they are great metaphors for breaking through your limitations.

That peak state is fun. I've done my share of woo-hoo sessions with the music playing and everyone dancing. It's great.

Next time I'm doing a three-day in-person Achieving Influence event you'll see exactly what I mean!

But that state has anything to do with influencing people to put their trust in you and spend thousands or millions of pounds, dollars, or euros with you.

In fact, meeting someone who is in that peak state is incredibly off-putting to most people, in most situations..

It plays right into the cliche behaviour of a salesperson.

Over-forceful. Over-dogmatic. Overbearing. Just over, really.

The mistake people make is starting from the wrong end of the equation.

It's not about YOU. It's about THEM.

THE WRONG LENS

People focus on how they want to feel starting a meeting or call. That's why all the emphasis on confidence, energy, enthusiasm.

In other words, people focus on what will get them to make the damn phone call in the first place, or take the risk of looking stupid when you walk into the meeting.

This the wrong lens.

What matters is not what you want to feel at the start of the conversation, but how your prospect needs to feel at the end of the conversation if they are going to spend happily money with you.

Start with the end in mind.

Sure, get yourself pumped up before a call. Go for it. Then calm the hell down, build rapport and focus on one question.

THE RIGHT LENS

That question is:

What do they have to think, know and feel in order to confidently put their business in your hands, today?

I apply that mindset to sales, copywriting, training courses, social media.

Imagine that I was going to ask you to spend £497 on a training course. What would you have to think, know and feel to confidently sign up for that?

And whatever the answer might be, my job is to use my state to create all of that in you.

If we're face-to-face or on the phone, I build rapport, test that I have it, and then start to create that state in me.

The stronger that state is in me, the more likely it is to "infect" you.

If I want you to go with me, I have to go there first.

Then there's a very good chance that you'll go there with me.

Obviously, doing that in writing is more difficult. But the process is the same.